Lost.

Oh, girl

How did you lose your way?

When did you become so weak?

When did you get so broken that you actually began to hope?

Don’t you know, there is no place for such silly notions

In this big, busy world

Did you actually begin to think

Someone would give a shit?

Wake up, girl

Wake up

And smell the crap

Because god knows, roses are but in fairy tales

Epiphany

And when it comes down to it

You realise

You really are alone

There is no help, no guiding light

The world

Is not your friend

There are only ghosts of love that linger

Empty promises

Shells of comforting words

The world is a selfish, selfish place

The sooner you know

The happier you will become

Not everyone comes face to face with their past, forced to admit fault and drown in guilt until eventually they emerged battered and breathless, stumbling into the future scarred, but healed. Not everyone is that lucky.

More and more often she found herself lost in a dizzying maze of her memories, groping and stumbling through laughs and tears, desperate to latch on to something, anything, that would convince her that things were still the same, that nothing was lost. She was too tired for change.

She sits there by him day and night
She sits there always in his sight
She watches him asleep in bed
She watches till her eyes are red
Counting down to the final goodnight.